Day 299: Nerves

04/17/2012

I would have loved for Ian to be here today. He would have been able to calm my nerves and helped me . Today was the day that I taught a lesson for the principal of the school I am working for. I was so nervous I thought I would throw up. I was pretty sure my lesson was ready to go, but really hoping I would be able to present it well. My husband wished me luck last night and encouraged me as much as he could, something I love about him. He let me talk through my lesson with him and told me that I was ready to do the lesson and that I would do great. He has a lot of faith in me and he is very encouraging.

So, this morning, I got up and went to work. I prepared a few last minute things during the conference time right before the lesson. Once the class came it, I was able to get started. The principal was there within a minute of me starting my lesson. It went well, as far as I could tell. The actual teacher was instructed to sit down at her desk and just observe, so I was left to completely control the class. It was helpful after it was over, because she was able to give me some feedback. She told me she thought it went well and that my classroom management was pretty good. The principal herself wasn't able to give me immediate feedback but I will try and ask for it tomorrow.

So, now that it is over, for better or worse, though I am still just as nervous. I really want to hear her feedback so I know what she thought about it and what I can do to improve. Again, it is a night that I really wish Ian were here. I just need him to hold me and help me get to sleep. I know it is a useless thing to wish for, because I can't change the predicament we are in, I can only daydream of the day he comes home when I no longer have to wish for his arms around me. Soon, he will be home, and we will be a whole family again.