Day 140: Trying to reign in the frustration

Today was a pretty good day, but was frustrating for me in that it didn't go as planned. I had the schedule in my head, and it just didn't happen that way. I expected my husband and dad to go and change the oil in my van and my husband's jeep this morning and they said it would take no more than an hour. Well, over 2 hours later, they finally make it back home. We were supposed to go to this drive thru safari that is about 20 min away from us, and I was frustrated now because we were late. The worst part is that I am not very good at hiding that kind of stuff and Ian knew I was frustrated. So, we went off to the safari and had a blast. My frustration quickly vanished when we got there and we were all having a good time feeding the animals. The best part was a camel named Mikey. Ian, the kids, and I were sitting in the bed of the truck with paper bags full of feed pellets as my dad was driving. We were throwing the feed to the other animals when we drove up close to Mikey. He walked right over to our truck, as it was moving, and reached right in and grabbed a full bag of feed right out of Natalie's hands and walked off. It made Natalie so upset for a minute until we gave her another bag and she saw how funny it actually was. Unfortunately, it happened so quickly that I did not get picture or video of it.

I have said this before, but these emotions I am facing are unexpected. I thought it would be a honeymoon time and I would be all happy-go-lucky. Instead, I am having times of frustration, anger, and guilt. I am trying to reign in my frustration and keep it from ruining any time I have left with my husband, but sometimes it is just not that easy. So far, it has only caused issues for a few minutes at a time and not a full day. This is actually an improvement from my norm. I have a tendency to be frustrated/mad most of the day. I guess what I am trying to say is that while, yes, I am having emotional "flare-ups" I have to give myself and Ian a little break and not expect everything to be perfect just because it is R&R.