Today was supposed to be a day that my best friend came for the weekend so we could go to a concert together tomorrow night. The original plan was that her kids and husband were supposed to stay home and it was just going to be her, my kids, and me. It was going to be time for us to just talk and hang out. Something I was looking forward to. What actually happened was that she asked if she could bring her husband and kids with her and I said yes. It really wasn't a bad thing because I adore her kids and my kids have so much fun playing with them. The hard part was that I just wasn't expecting to be really entertaining this weekend. My best friend doesn't count in the entertaining part, because if it is just her we would have just hung out and chatted or watched movies. Instead, I was worried about what my house looked like and about getting places for people to sleep and getting sheets and towels washed and ready. It wasn't bad, just more work than I really wanted to do at that time this morning, because I really hadn't come out of my bad mood. I hate to make it sound like an imposition, because it wasn't, it was just unexpected.
To be honest, it was also hard because I have only been without Ian again for two weeks and the pain of separation is still there. No matter where I go, it is a little rough seeing couples together because it always reminds me of what I am missing right now. Something always goes through my head and reminds me that I would be holding my husbands hand the same way, or hugging him just like that if he were home. The hard part was having it here in my own house after just two weeks of being alone again. I know this sounds bad, and I really am sorry. It is just how I feel right now, I feel lonely without Ian, especially in my own home, and seeing a couple (even though I am happy for them being together) reminds me of what I am missing right now. I am in no way bitter for any other couple, just reminded of the one I am missing right now.
Despite all that, it was a fun day. The kids had a blast and my best friend and I got to go to the movies together. My nerd self saw "Breaking Dawn" again because it is a requirement for my best friend and I to watch all Twilight movies together. We both had fun joking on a few funny lines and talking about the stuff we missed the first time we saw it. Basically, we had fun being nerds together.
Tomorrow night we are going to see a concert and I can't wait! It is our second concert together and the two of us always have fun at concerts!
Getting a day closer all the time. A day closer to being in my husband's arms and being able to be a couple again.
No comments:
Post a Comment