Day 87: I thought daydreaming about a guy was for teenagers

It is Saturday. Saturday's are the slow day of the weekend most of the time. Sunday's are filled with church and stuff like that, but Saturday, well, you have to find stuff to do on Saturdays. Today the kids and I did our chores after we got to talk to Ian. It was only for about 30 minutes, and the kids talked to him the most, but that is what the weekend conversations are for... the kids. I get to talk to him during the week, and even though I would love to hog his time, I know the kids need it too. As the kids were talking to him, I was trying to figure out what I was going to give these kids for breakfast. I had no milk, no pancake mix, no frozen waffles, no eggs, no bacon... Nothing. As I am scouring the pantry, I see OATMEAL! Score! No argument was allowed when I told the kids they were having oatmeal for breakfast. They pretty much know when I say "This is what we are having," they can't argue with me. I made oatmeal for Daniel and he sat to eat it and thought it was quite funny for Ian to see him eating breakfast. Of course, Daniel made it funny. So he showed Ian his food, told him in detail what it was, and smiled every time he took a bite while Ian watched. It was pretty funny. After that, I talked to Ian for about 7-8 minutes and then he had to go. The rest of the day was mostly cleaning and then swim lessons.

I have been daydreaming like crazy today, I can't help it. I feel like a teenager with a crush on the boy in the first row. The one big difference is that my daydreams have been of Ian being home. I keep seeing him here helping me with dishes, or just sitting and talking to me as we watch the kids play. Saturdays are good and bad for that. I have a lot of time on my hands and can't help the way my thoughts always seem to drift to Ian. During the week, it is normal for him not to be home because he is at work. The weekends, however, is family time and his absence is more obvious.

I usually write Ian an email at the end of everyday to tell him about what has happened. Today, I had to send him an email early, out of the routine. I just had to tell him I love him. It had to be said. I had to tell him how grateful I am to have him as my partner for life and that my life is better because he loves me and I him. I know, it is sappy, but it is true. I can't help the days where I miss him so much that it is almost painful. The only thing I can do is deal with it the best I can and always, always, tell my husband how much I love him and how proud I am of him.

I am the luckiest woman in the world to have a husband that loves me for me and who stands by me no matter how far apart we are. Another day down.... and we are getting closer!