Day 204: Tough day

1/11/2012

Today was a hard day in the mom department. I had talked to Ian about wanting to get a small dog for myself and the kids because I have missed having a small dog since Lucy died in October. I pulled the "deployment card" with my husband and told him it was something I needed right now, and not just now, but for ever. We both love our big dogs, but we both love having a small dog that we can have sit with us on the couch. So, he said yes, that I could get one. He loves me and spoils me!

I found a dog at the local pound that looked just like a dog I had as a teenager. So, yesterday, I took the kids down to the pound to look at her. She was super sweet and really seemed to love the kids and me. We ended up adopting her yesterday and brought her home. She was so happy to be in the car with us and then we had to introduce her to our other dogs. They seemed to do okay together but needed to work through it. Well, after having her less than an hour, my son bent down to pet her and got too close. She nipped at him. That was a deal breaker for me. I watched her like a hawk to see if it was just a one time thing. Unfortunately, it wasn't. She nipped at him twice more and then nipped at my oldest when she touched her tail. So, I decided I would have to take her back. I felt bad, but I had to do what was best for my kids. The dog was super sweet with me and followed me everywhere. She was so happy and loved just hanging out with me.

As much as I wanted to keep her, I had to take her back today. It was hard to explain it to the kids. They said they would leave her alone and not touch her tail. I told them it wasn't just them. I was worried about the other little kids that come over to our house. They might touch her tail or get too close to her face, and then she would bite them. I couldn't risk my own kids as well as my friend's kids. So, I asked a friend of mine to watch my kids after school today so I could take her back without them having to be there. I took her back and cried. I hope she finds a good home, but I was sad that I could not give her that home.

It is the part of being a temporary single mom that sucks. Having to make decisions that you know are going to make your kids cry, even though it is in their best interest. Ian could only tell me that he supported my decision and wishes he was here to help me out and help me deal it. I knew that, and I was grateful that he was able to talk to me though it and let me just talk it out with him.