It is Sunday. I have always loved Sundays because it is a day that I devote to my God and my family. Now, on top of that, Sundays are a day that I really miss Ian. It was the day we would spend together. We would get up, make breakfast, get the kids ready for church, and sit together in services. After church we would go to lunch as a family. Now, I am still devoted to God and my family, but Ian's absence is more pronounced. I just miss him.
Today, I had lunch with a new friend at my home after we went to our separate Sunday services. It was nice. She is going through a deployment too and it is nice to have someone to talk to who is experiencing what you are experiencing at the same time. I have my family, who mostly are not military, and they can empathize. They understand, to a degree, about the separation I am feeling, but they can not truly understand as they have not gone through this. Then there are my other friends who have been through at least one deployment. They are great to talk to because they can sympathize with me and can offer "I made it to the other side" advice to help me in difficult times. It is still different though. Sometimes, it feels like they are telling me that they got through it, so I will be fine. And while, yes, that is true, I still sometimes just have to whine and talk to someone about it.
Meeting my new friend, Carmon, was a chance meeting that happened back when we first got here. Me, being the overly talkative, outgoing type, saw her at the park while we were waiting for the kids to get out of school, and said hi. She isn't the conversation starting type, so I was a little weird to her. We ended the conversation by adding each other to Facebook, and had not seen each other since. Then, this past week I invited her to coffee. I knew we both needed a friend and didn't realize until we started talking and hanging out more, just how much I needed a friend who was going through a deployment at the same time. It really has made all the difference. We can both talk about what is going on, how we are feeling today, and how much we miss our husbands, and it is ok. We don't have to put on the brave face because we both know we are going through the same thing at the same time. I have all my friends, the ones who have gone through deployment, the ones who haven't, and now, I have a friend who is. I have a battle buddy. I know I will gain more as the time goes by, but for now, just having one is a huge blessing and help for me.
Another day done... Another weekend past without him. Another day closer.
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