Saturday, August 13, 2011

Day 52: Dang it, my husband was right.

This morning, Ian and I got into a bit of a texting "argument," if you can really call it that, using his email address to my cell phone. Basically the gist of it is that Ian knew I was going to be sending the kids to daycare for 6 hours today. He thought I should get a pedicure. I disagreed with him because I did not want to spend the money on it. We are trying very hard to cut the budget and start paying stuff off while he is gone. So, then, not to my surprise, he did the selfless thing and told me that the money I have in the budget to send him a package this paycheck, to not use it on him but on me instead. I kept arguing with him that I did not like the idea that I would not be sending him a package this paycheck. He insisted that my mom has taken such good care of him and that the packages I have sent him contained all the other necessities, that he is not in need of anything. So, we kept arguing and finally he gave me an "order." He told me that I HAD to get a pedicure and that tonight I am to take something to help me sleep and get to bed EARLY. It took him about 4 tries of asking for a promise, but eventually, he won.

The other argument that I made with him about not getting the pedicure was that I really didn't NEED it. I haven't had one since 2 weeks before he left, but honestly, I would be lucky to get one every 3-4 months before anyways. He said that I do need one. He kept telling me that I needed to do something for myself and that a pedicure would help me relax and would make my legs and feet feel better. Of course, I am stubborn and told him it would not make a difference. It is with swallowed pride that I admit tonight, in writing, that my husband was correct. Spending the time today on just me, getting a little pampered and then just reading a book, completely recharged me. I initially planned to do some housework or grocery shopping while the kids were gone, but Ian insisted I do something for me. Then I thought about a movie, but the one I wanted to see showed to late in my free time for me to pick up the kids in time. So, I was back to thinking about coming home and cleaning. While having the house spotless would have been nice, I think the day to myself really rejuvenated me. Before picking up the girls, I stopped at the commissary (the grocery store for the civilians out there) and grabbed stuff to make a quick dinner for the kids. I found myself smiling for no reason, walking a little faster but looking up and not down, and I was more cheerful with the people in the store. It surprised me when I realized how I was acting that the break from the kids and the pampering for myself, as much as I love my kids, really did affect my mood.

I was eager to pick up the kids. I didn't feel as stressed or drained when I was trying to get them in and out of the car and when I was trying to get them to eat their dinner. So, yes, my husband was right. Taking a break every once in a while and doing something just for you really does recharge your batteries and helps you handle being a single mom so much better. From 7,000+ miles away, my husband is telling me what I need, telling me to take care of myself, and he is right... I think I have entered the Twilight Zone! :-) In all seriousness though, he was worried about me and the lack of sleep I am getting, so that is why he ordered the relaxation and early bedtime. I don't like that he is worried about me, because that is not ok. So, I guess the answer here is that if I don't want him to be worried about me, I need to start taking care of myself and not give him something to worry about.... Right. Easier said than done, but I guess that is one of my new tasks.

One day is done. A good day overall, but definitely would be better if my husband were home. It is ok though, because we are getting closer every day to being in each other's arms again. 

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