Today was pretty relaxing for me. After my busy day yesterday with the cake, I decided today would be a day that I cleaned and maybe rested. I delivered the cake I made and the mother was so grateful! She was tearing up because she thought it looked good and knew her son would love it. I got to see a picture of the birthday boy's smile when he saw his cake and it made all the hard work worth it. I then came home with the intention of cleaning up a little and then relaxing. I ended up being so tired from getting 3 1/2 hours of sleep last night that I decided to just relax, watch a few shows and then I took an awesome nap. I picked up the kids at school and when we got home the kids were pretty much set on pushing my buttons. I asked them to clean up their rooms and they fought me every step of the way. I got my stuff done, but it was a bit painful trying to get them to do their chores. Just one of those days.
Tonight, I am thinking about a problem that has come up that I did not expect. I thought that the kids would do better with Ian's deployment once school started. I had hoped that they would be distracted by school and that not being around the house all day would help them. Well, I am not sure if that assumption will prove true. The problem we are running into is that Ian is only really able to call during the day, mostly in the morning right now, or late at night. It is becoming a problem because the kids want to talk to Ian and wonder if he called while they were at school. Now, the only time the kids can talk to him is on the weekend. Here lies the dillemma that I am dealing with. Currently I am volunteering at church in the nursery. I do this every other weekend and have to be there for the 9am service and work the 11am service, so basically I am unavailable from 8:45am-1pm. This leaves no time for my husband to call and talk to the kids. So, my problem is, I am thinking about stepping back from volunteering right now so that my kids have an opportunity to talk to Ian whenever he is able to call. The flip-side of that coin is that if I do that it might seem as though I am putting life on hold to wait for a phone call. It is a hard line to walk- between living life as normal and being available to talk to Ian. I am mostly worried that the kids are going to start having troubles and not enjoying school because they aren't able to talk to daddy except maybe on Saturdays. My oldest has already said how much it "sucks" that she is in school when daddy calls.
So, how do you walk that line. How do you keep yourself available for phone calls and still do the things you have always done? Problem is, I don't know. I know that my husband's schedule might change and the times that he can call will probably change too. I just know that right now, the kids come home every day and ask if daddy called and if he is going to call when they are home. Every time I tell them no, their face falls. They beg me to wake them up in the middle of the night if their daddy calls. Of course, I can't do that. They need their sleep. So, what do I do? Do I step back from nursery giving an extra 2 hours of calling time for the kids to possibly hear from Ian? Or do I keep doing what I am doing and hope it gets easier? I don't know. I will have to pray about it and think about it. I just want to do what is best for my kids and help them get through this deployment. I hate having to make a decision like this, because either way, I am going to have to let someone down.
Goodbye August 24th! It was nice, but you have to go because I want to be one day closer to seeing my man again!
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