Day 57: Reality Bites

So we are close to hitting the two month mark of this deployment. It is about the time I figured that reality would kick in and I would start having issues. Man, I couldn't have called it any more accurately.

Today was the meet and greet at the school. We got to go to the school, meet the kids' teachers, and drop off their school supplies. So, we go in to the elementary where the younger two are attending. We find out who their teachers are and head to Daniel's class first. We talk to the teacher for a few minutes and she asks for a picture of Ian and Daniel together, if I have one, for the soldier board in her class. I told her I would get one and also informed her that Ian is currently deployed and would not be back until the end of the school year. After that, we went to meet Natalie's teacher. She was very nice as well. We talked with her about the fact that Ian is deployed as well and she actually offered some advice for R&R. She said, in order to keep the absences counting against Natalie's attendance, I can withdraw her for the two weeks Ian is home and re-register her after he leaves. She said they will hold her spot in class and it will not be that difficult. I thought it sounded weird, but she said that because it is a military school, it is ok. So, we will see about that.

After we finished up with the younger kids' school, we had to make the trek all the way across base that takes 15 minutes in light traffic to go to Emily's school. I was not happy about this. I don't understand why they make her go to a school all the way across post, requiring her to get on a bus at 6:30am, when they have other schools within a mile or less of the pre-k through 3rd grade school my other children attend. It just frustrates me. And to make it worse, I literally hit EVERY light on the way. When I got there, parking was impossible, and it was just crowded all together. So, I walk through the school, dragging my children, and met Emily's teacher. I asked her about after school programs, which she couldn't really tell me about, so apparently I will have to wait until after school starts before they start up the clubs and send any information out about them. I also asked if they have any sort of activity bus for the kids that want to do after school clubs, but live ALL THE WAY ACROSS POST. She said they didn't. Yeah, didn't help my mood. So basically, for my kid to do any clubs, I am going to have to drive AT LEAST 15 minutes each way, but at that time of day, soldiers are getting off work, so the commute time could be as much as 30 minutes each way. This whole thing has me beyond frustrated. I know I shouldn't be this upset about it, but I also have no backup from my husband in case of an issue. I have to rely on friends, which isn't bad, but it isn't my husband.

This summer, reality hasn't kicked in, for the most part. I have not had to really run the kids all over the place. I have not had to set up a strict morning schedule and get them to school everyday. I have not had to rush because I have no one else to back me up. Now, with school starting, I will really feel the absence of my husband. In the mornings, my husband would come home, make coffee, help get the kids breakfast, and maybe even walk them to school. In the afternoons he would help with homework, if it wasn't done yet, make dinner a few nights of the week, help get kids to bed, and on Thursday's if he got home in time, he would pick the kids up from school, or we would walk together to get them. If the kids had something in the early evening, I would take them, and he would make dinner, or vice versa. He was a BIG part of our school year routine. He was my tag-team partner. On days when I was super busy, he would try and get a few minutes away from work to help me out by picking up the kids. When the girls were together at the school located close to us, it wasn't that big of a deal. Now that the kids are completely spread out, I am toast. If Emily misses the bus, it will be hard to get her to school and then get the younger kids to school on time. If she has to stay after, it will be insanely difficult to get the younger two, then drive across post, pick her up, get homework done, and get dinner on the table, while still getting the kids to bed at a decent hour. Don't get me started on the gas I will use up in my van.

Reality bites. Or should I say, reality without my husband bites. I hope that all these problems I am anticipating will not really be problems and that I can be supermom and handle it all by myself. But, without sounding like a toddler too much, I don't wanna! But....... I will. I will do all this because even though my current reality bites hard, it will not be my forever reality. Ian will come home and he will once again be my tag-team partner in this crazy thing we call our family. I just have to keep it together until then... I think I can fake a pretty good supermom. I won't feel like a supermom, but to my kids, they will think I am doing just fine with all of this. I hope.

One day down, another day closer to seeing him again.

<3 Loving my soldier more everyday. <3