Missing Milestones

When you think about a deployment you immediately think about all the things the soldier will miss. All the holidays, birthdays, recitals, games, etc. that he will miss and it can be upsetting. Even in our last deployment that was our (and I say our because Ian and I both felt this way) biggest concern, how much Ian would miss in the year he was gone. To be honest, that was our main concern for this deployment... Until now.

I realized today that I have missed a big event in Ian's life. It didn't register until I saw a picture of Ian reenlisting in Afghanistan in front of an American flag, without me there. I was insanely proud of him, but I wasn't there for it. I have been there from day one. I have been there for every promotion ceremony and every reenlistment ceremony. So, seeing a picture of him reenlisting without me in it was surprisingly upsetting. I know it is a fact of the Army life, but I didn't realize how upset I would be about missing something like that. It is a big deal for me. I love being there for him and being a supportive part of his military career. I love that I have been there to watch his career progress and his commitment to the Army continue. I really wished I was there for it this time. I wish I could have been able to stand next to him as he raised his right hand and swore to defend our country for 4 more years. I wish I could have been there to see it, to hear it, and to hug him afterwards and tell him how proud I was of him. I know I can say that now, through the computer, but it just isn't the same. I just didn't realize what milestones I would be missing out on. It was quite the eye opener for me today. It gave me a small insight into exactly how Ian must be feeling when he sees the pictures of our milestones without him in them.

To my husband: I am so proud of you and the amazing man, husband, father, and soldier that you are. I am sorry I wasn't there but I hope you know how much I wish I was there and how insanely proud of you I am . I have been given a glimpse and can begin to understand how missing as much as you do can be so hard, but you do it because you love us and love your country. I love you with all my heart and will always be standing behind you cheering you on..... Even from 7,000 miles away. I love you! ~Laura